Beware: This Lovey-Dovey Tarot Card Isn’t What It Seems On First Pull
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February 15, 2021 — 13:25 PM
Doing a tarot reading is a fun and mystical way to tap your intuition and dive into your subconscious. Each of the 78 cards in a tarot deck has a specific meaning—and it’s not always one you’d expect.
For example, the Lovers card, despite its name, doesn’t necessarily mean smooth sailing. Here’s everything you need to know about this card, including what it means for relationships, your professional life, and the challenges that could lie ahead for you.
What does the Lovers card mean?
As tarot reader and founder of Witchy Wellness Leah Vanderveldt explains to mbg, the Lovers is a complex card. “Ruled by Gemini, it’s a card about connection and the possibilities of deep intimacy. When this card shows up, we are usually giving our power away to something outside of ourselves. Sometimes it’s a relationship; other times it’s a title, job, or something material,” she adds.
Blaire Porter and Britt June with tarot company Threads of Fate add, “The Lovers card represents relationships and choice—and though not exclusively, it is typically about romantic relationships.”
When we pull this card, it indicates we may feel like external circumstances and relationships give us value. “If you took that particular person away, you are still a loved and loving individual. If you took the job away, you are still capable and good at what you do,” Vanderveldt notes. “It’s a process of choosing yourself first before engaging in a healthy relationship with anything outside yourself […] We’re being asked to fully accept ourselves as worthy.”
What does it mean for love & relationships?
You would think a card called the Lovers would be a foolproof sign of luck in love, but that’s not always the case. “Love is always a choice,” Porter and June say, “and it is much more about ourselves than other people. To have the types of relationships we want to have […], we must be clear about who we are and what we want to call into our lives.”
In some cases this can mean knowing when to end a relationship that doesn’t serve you, or checking your own toxic or unhealthy behavior. As Vanderveldt adds, when you pull this card, “Ask yourself: How are you aligning with your values within your relationship? You’re finding a balance that’s right for the both of you; what does that look like?“
The card asks you to explore what your relationship is bringing up for you and how you can generate that love from within, she says.
“This is deep work,” Porter and June add. “It is shedding inherited patterns so we can have the life and relationships we truly desire, but we must first make those tough choices and leave the old ways.”
To pull the Lovers in reverse indicates disharmony and reluctance. There may be a “sense that this other person is ‘too good’ for you,” Vanderveldt says. “It’s a conflict between the head and heart that causes an imbalance.” You may also be stuck in unconscious patterns, Porter and June note, “causing you to act out of alignment with your truth.” (For example, feeling triggered and shutting down, or unconsciously rejecting your partner out of fear.)
“You are being asked to not act impulsively and to get to the heart of the matter,” they add. “If things are feeling imbalanced in your relationship, sit with why.” As Vanderveldt suggests, you can ask yourself, Where do your beliefs about love come from? How can you embrace vulnerability and honesty in relationship?
What does it mean for professional & financial matters?
If you pull the Lovers in a reading about your career or finances, it could represent a new partnership within your career, or even a different, more fulfilling career path, Porter and June say. “The choice aspect of the Lovers may also be highlighted. Are you wanting to find a new job? Are you looking for new opportunities?”
As Vanderveldt explains, this card is a sign that “It’s time to align your actions out in the world with your inner needs and desires. Choose yourself, align with your core self, and don’t allow a number or a title to define who you are or show you how worthy you are.”
To pull this card in reverse in a career reading would again indicate some sort of conflict or disharmony. “You may feel unfulfilled or are perhaps dealing with negative co-workers,” Porter and June note. “Financially, you may be in an unconscious pattern.” Ultimately, the card is inviting you to take a closer look at the situation to figure out what you need.
“Go deep within to find what you truly want for yourself—outside of money or appearances—and find the values that you connect with to be your guiding force,” Vanderveldt says, adding that this is a time for self-compassion and reevaluation.
What does it say about challenges that lie ahead?
“I think this is a challenging card, full stop, because there are a lot of internal shifts being asked of the querent regardless of position,” Vanderveldt notes. This card is all about reexamining the way we engage with connection, vulnerability, and our own self-image, she adds. And as Porter and June explain, “On some level, this card will always have an aspect of choice, and this is where the challenges come in.”
If you pull this card in reverse, it may just mean these challenges will come in a bit harder and faster, Porter and June say, “but the idea that you are being asked to be in alignment is there.” Tough questions, like, Is your relationship no longer suiting you? Do radical steps need to be taken? Do you need to choose a new career path? should all be considered.
Taking a modern approach.
As time goes on and new decks are made, creators have the opportunity to put their own spin on this card. For June, who illustrates Threads of Fate’s decks, “Duality and balance are heavily at play” in her version of the Lovers, she says. “The hands on our Lovers card balance each other through position and symbolism. [They’re] co-creating, and whether they symbolize hands from one person, two people, or someone and a situation, they are choosing to co-create.” It raises the question, What are you creating?
For Vanderveldt, she likes to see newer decks go outside heteronormative contexts, as the cards have “evolved to shed light on the deep connections we make with others and the ways we approach intimacy of all kinds rather than just romantic or physical relationships.”
This complicated card is full of nuance but great for self-exploration and figuring out where in your life you may be sacrificing yourself. It asks us to examine our choices so we can show up to life and love as authentically as possible.
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